The Interview
by GoldietheFazbear
Summary: In this spinoff of BonnieBunBun and GoldieTheFazbear's "Fazbabies", GoldieTheFazbear will be interviewing all of the Fazgang and event the Toys to see what they think of each other. Note- This story will be written in script form, so it will be different from most fanfics. But still, the funny part will come in when Golden Freddy is being interviewed.
1. Freddy

**Alright, you guys. BonnieBunBun and I have been working on a fanfic together. Here's the link. It's called Fazbabies. This interview is a spinoff of Fazbabies.**

 **s/11506564/1/Fazbabies**

 **This fanfic is very different from most ones, but it is also quite unique in it's own way. It will be written in script form instead of 1st, 2nd, or 3rd person. Noises and actions will be in between asterisks. Now, I know that this is a little weird, but it's still fanfiction, and I can still post it. This story will be about my character OC interviewing each of the baby animatronics to see what they think of each other. Yes, this is weird. Yes, this will be cleaner and less entertaining than my other stories. But yes, this is still fanfiction. I hope you keep that in mind, and be sure to check out me and BonnieBunBun's story, Fazbabies! Alright, don't hate me for this!**

GoldieTheFazbear: "Hey everybody, and welcome to The Goldie Show! How's it going? Not so well? Who cares! We are here to interview each and every one of the baby animatronics in Fazbabies and see what they have to say about all the other ones!"

*Applause*

GoldieTheFazbear: "Anyway, let's start with interviewing one of the most important characters in the story- Freddy Fazbear himself!"

Freddy: "Hey GoldieTheFazbear! So, what did you bring me here for?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "I brought you here to interview you and see what you have to say about everyone else,"

Freddy: "Well, I know that I'm gonna say some mean stuff about other people..."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh, well, let's not make up our minds now, the interview hasn't even started yet!"

Freddy: "Too bad! Now it has!"

*Lively music starts and crowd cheers*

GoldieTheFazbear: "Alright, let's start out by asking you a simple question- What do you think of your brother Goldie?"

Freddy: "Well, he can be a meanie, and he's always making fun of people. But, well, he's my brother, and sometimes he can be funny."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ooh, so a neutral opinion. Well, at least you guys don't have any sibling rivalry! Next question- What do you think about Bonnie?"

Freddy: "Bonnie? She's the sweetest, prettiest, girl I've ever met! I just want to hug and hug her and never let her go. Someday, I hope to take her to a beach, and get married-"

GoldieTheFazbear- *nauseated* : "Ok, that's enough! SO you really like this girl, huh? Ok, I get the point, it's gross! Anyway, on with the show! What about Chica?"

Freddy: "She's super nice, but she is a huge crybaby. You do not know how annoying she gets when she cries! Also, what did you say about love?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Love is gross, but still, what about your nemesis, Foxy?"

Freddy: "I HATE that meanie! He thinks that he can kiss Bonnie and get away with it? All this time he's been trying to steal my girl, and he's hurt her more than he has helped her! He's a big jerkface! And no, love isn't gross, it's a great thing!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Alright, it's your problem that you like love. So, there's some real conflict between you and Foxy, huh?"

Freddy: "He thinks that he can get away with kissing Bonnie! She's MY GIRLFRIEND!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ok, calm the fuck down, you little rascal. How about the Toys?"

Freddy: "Well, some of them are really mean. Like Toy Bonnie. All she does is put on makeup and brag about how pretty she is while Bonnie is like a million times prettier! And she always calls people ugly even if they're prettier than her!"

GoldieTheFazbear: Well then, thanks for telling me. I'll be interviewing Toy Bonnie later in the day. I'll see what that mofo bitch has to say about me... Sorry, I really shouldn't swear too much on this show. Anyway, what's Toy Chica like?"

Freddy: "She's really girly, and she hates dirt. This time I tagged her after falling into some dirt, she screamed. But she's a teeny bit nicer than Toy Bonnie.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Interesting. How about you r Toy counterpart, Toy Freddy? Is he nice, or is he mean like the others?"

Freddy: "He's super-duper nice, but he's really stupid. He never gets what's going on."

GoldieTheFazbear: Well, time's almost up for this interview, but there's still one more animatronic. Mangle."

Freddy: "She's really quiet, and she never ever talks to anyone. She seems kinda nice, if you ask me,"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Thanks, Freddy! Well, that concludes this interview! I hope you had a good time on The Goldie Show! Are there any final words you'd like to say?"

Freddy: "Well, FOXY! BONNIE'S MY GIRL! YOU CAN NEVER EVER TAKE HER AWAY FROM ME! SO STOP IT, YOU BUTTFACE!"

Freddy smashes GoldieTheFazbear's $100 vintage coffee mug on the floor.

*Audience gasps*

GoldieTheFazbear: "Hey! That was my $100 mug, and you've just ruined it! Now how am I supposed to drink my coffee, lick it off of the floor? Get out! Now!"

Freddy: "But, But!-"

GoldieTheFazbear: "GET OUT OF HERE, YOU BASTARD!"

Goldie picks up Freddy and throws him offstage.

*Curtain closes*


	2. A Catastrophe in The Studio

**Guys, this will be a short chapter considering Goldie attacking everyone. The next chapter WILL be longer, by like, a lot.**

GoldieTheFazbear: "Sorry about that, guys. Freddy might need some anger management. Well, that brings us to our next guest on The Goldie Show, the one and only Golden Freddy!"

GoldieTheFazbear lets an infuriated Golden Freddy in, and he begins to attack the stage crew.

Golden Freddy: "GOD DAMN IT, TURN ME BACK TO MY NORMAL AGE YOU MOTHERFUCKERS!"

Golden Freddy starts to strangle Mike, a member of the crew

Audience screams

Stage Crew Mike: "OH MY GOD! YOU FREAKING PSYCHOPATH!"

Stage Crew Jeremy: "SECURITY! GET OVER HERE ASAP!"

Stage Crew Vincent: "Oh, I'm sure Mike will be fine, no need to call the guards,"

Golden Freddy: "That's right. NOW TURN ME BACK TO AN ADULT, YOU SON OF A BITCH!"

Goldie pulls out a gun and shoots Golden Freddy in the neck with a tranquilizer dart. Audience gasps.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Yeah, he'll be out in a minute."

Golden Freddy continues to strangle Mike, who is about to pass out from asphyxiation

Golden Freddy: "TURN...ME...BACK!"

A glaze comes over his eyes and he starts to lose consciousness

Golden Freddy: "Y-you bastards, t-turn...me...back,"

Golden Freddy faints and falls off of Mike's neck.

Stage Crew Jeremy: "That was close. Ok, we are never letting anyone in this studio again without a background check."

Stage Crew Vincent: "Aww, but Golden Freddy was winning!"

Mike and Jeremy glare at Vincent

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ok, that was...far from exemplary. We'll be back when Golden Freddy regains consciousness!"

Curtain closes and audience boos Golden Freddy


	3. Golden Freddy

2 hours later...

Eventually, Goldie starts to wake up, but is "drunk" from the tranquilizer dart.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ugh, FINALLY! I was just about to kick you out of the studio!"

Golden Freddy: "The hell is going on?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "You're on live TV with over 5 million viewers. Now say hi to the audience!"

Golden Freddy: "H-hi to the audience,"

GoldieTheFazbear: "No, you imbecile!"

Goldie slaps Golden Freddy across the face, waking him up.

Golden Freddy: "Ow! You bitch!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "There we go. NOW say hi to your fans!"

Golden Freddy: "Sup, bitches?"

Audience laughs

GoldieTheFazbear: "Well, looks like we've got quite a show ahead of us today! So, Goldie, who's your favorite person at school, and why?"

Golden Freddy: "Well, Bonnie and Chica are ok, but the rest of them are all big fucking douches."

Audience laughs

Golden Freddy: "Except, Chica, you know, she cries way too much and it gets SOOOOO ANNOYING! Bonnie's super nice, but she's too sensitive. And don't even get me started on the Toys. I motherfucking hate them!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Wow, you really don't like people, do you?"

Golden Freddy: "Goldie, you couldn't be more right about that."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Looks like we have the same problem,"

Audience boos

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh, shit! I almost forgot about you guys! Just to clarify, I'm fine with you guys, but I don't like people who try to get up in my face. Got it?"

Audience nods.

Golden Freddy: "Well, at least that's settled."

GoldieTheFazbear: "How about your brother? Do you love him or hate him?"

Golden Freddy: "Freddy? He's pretty nice in general, but whenever he starts getting all lovey with Bonnie, it makes me want to puke! It's super gross and irritating! And please, do NOT mention him kissing her, or I will literally vomit all over the stage! I really hate how he does that in front of everyone! It's repugnant!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Wow, we have a lot in common! I hate romance as well! About Freddy, I just interviewed him, and he grossed me out about Bonnie. That was not cool."

Golden Freddy: "Yeah..."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Anyway, one final Fazgang member- Foxy? What about him?"

Golden Freddy: "He's fine, but he's such a perv! One time, he tried to harass Bonnie- I almost puked my guts up!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ok, I'll watch him closely when I interview him. Finally, what do you think about the Toys?"

Golden Freddy: "I hate the majority of them. For instance, Toy Bonnie is such a narcissist! All she cares about is putting on makeup, designer clothes, and how she looks! She always makes fun of other people for their appearance, but she's hideous without makeup!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Alright, I better grab a wet Kleenex and see how pretty she really is,"

Golden Freddy: "Yeah, I bet you could wipe off 99% of her beauty using that Kleenex,"

Audience laughs

Toy Bonnie Fans: "Shut the hell up!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "You! Fuck off!"

Goldie flips off the Toy Bonnie fans, and the audience cracks up.

GoldieTheFazbear: "What about Toy Chica?"

Golden Freddy: "Still hate her. I accidentally got the tiniest bit of dirt on her, and she flipped out. I mean, the hell's your problem, bitch?"

Even more laughing

GoldieTheFazbear: "How about the dumbass Toy Freddy? And Mangle?"

Golden Freddy: "Well, you got that right, Goldie. He's like a complete retard. His IQ is like, -20 or something impossibly dumb like that. Fucking retard."

Audience laughs

GoldieTheFazbear: "Well, I'm dreading an interview with him..."

Golden Freddy: "Yeah. Back to my point. Mangle's fine, I just don't like her that much."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Alright. Now just 'cause you're my favorite member of the Fazgang, I have a bonus trivia question that will earn you 20 dollars!"

Golden Freddy: "Bring it on, bitch!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "On the first day of school at daycare, how many people wet themselves and who?"

Golden Freddy: "Um, got it! 2 people, they were Bonnie and Foxy!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Exactly on point!"

Goldie pulls out 20 singles and makes it rain.

Golden Freddy: "Um, we're not in a strip club,"

Audience bursts into laughter.

GoldieTheFazbear: "It's fun! Here, take 10 singles as a bonus!"

Golden Freddy tries it out and decides that throwing money is fun

Golden Freddy: "Yeah, it kind of is fun!"

Audience claps

GoldieTheFazbear "Anyway, Goldie, it was a lot of fun interviewing you, and we hope to see you soon on The Goldie Show!"

Golden Freddy collects the money and begins to walk offstage

Golden Freddy: "Yeah it was actually a lot more fun than I expected. See ya, suckers!"

Goldie walks to the end of the stage and is about to exit when he spots Mike.

Golden Freddy: "You...BASTARD!"

He lunges toward Mike and starts attacking him again.

Stage Crew Mike: "Why, YOU LITTLE SHIT! GET OFF OF ME!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "OH MY FUCKING GOD!"

Curtain closes and audience cheers.


	4. Bonnie, ft BonnieBunBun

GoldieTheFazbear: "Uh, well, that was... interesting."

Audience boos Golden Freddy and GoldieTheFazbear takes a sip of coffee out of a new mug

GoldieTheFazbear: "Anyway, next up, I have a very special guest joining tonight along with our next interviewee. Please welcome the main writer of Fazbabies, BonnieBunBun!"

BonnieBunBun walks out on stage carrying baby Bonnie.

Audience cheers loudly, and Bonnie starts crying

Bonnie: "OWWWWW! STOP IT!"

BonnieBunBun: "Yeah, she's scared of loud noises, just saying,"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Alright, alright, settle down-Hey! Be quiet-SHUT UP!"

Audience stops screaming.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ok, that's good. Now, Bonnie, what do you think of your boyfriend?"

Bonnie: "Well, he's so sweet! He even helped fight off Foxy for me once! I hope we get married, and then we could be together...Forever. I really love him!"

Audience awws and Goldie puts her hand over her mouth

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh dear god, why all of this love talk?"

BonnieBunBun: "Oh, stop being immature, Goldie!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "It's not called being immature! It's called hating romance!"

BonnieBunBun: "Whatever,"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Anyways. Bonnie? Who's your best friend in preschool?"

Bonnie: "Chica! She's like, the nicest ever! We're gonna be best friends forever. Except she cries too much, and it's sort of annoying. And she pees her pants a lot."

Audience laughs

Bonnie: "Goldie, can I leave now? The noise is scaring me!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "No, but you can have THESE!"

GoldieTheFazbear hands Bonnie a pair of noise reduction headphones

GoldieTheFazbear: "Alright, on with the questions. What about my personal favorite Goldie?"

Bonnie: "He's kinda mean but he does the best things! You should have seen the time he roasted that toy bitch!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Uh, which one?"

BonnieBunBun whispers something to Goldie

BonnieBunBun: "Toy Bonnie"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ok, good for him! How 'bout your boyfriend's arch-nemesis?"

Bonnie: "Uh, Foxy? I have no idea what ne-nemes-neme-"

GoldieTheFazbear: "It's nemesis, and yes, it's Foxy."

Bonnie: "Oh my GOD, he is SO ANNOYING! He keeps on trying to get me to become his girlfriend, but he needs to understand that he's a selfish, annoying jerk!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ok, so apparently everyone hates Foxy..."

Audience boos

BonnieBunBun: "You know, Foxy is actually the most liked of all the original Fnaf characters..."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Damn it! I really don't see why he's so popular!"

An audience member throws a water bottle at Goldie's face, but she ducks and it hits the backdrop

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ha! Missed me didn't you, you douchebag!"

BonnieBunBun: "Uh, changing subjects! B-back to the interview! So what about the Toys?"

Bonnie: "I HATE THEM! ALL THEY DO IS JUDGE YOU BY YOUR APPEARANCE, AND IT'S SO STUPID!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh yeah, Toy Bonnie and Toy Chica!"

Bonnie: "She tried to steal my boyfriend Freddy! What a bitch!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "What about Toy Chica?"

Bonnie: "She's still super mean! All she does is side with Toy Bonnie for everything!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "And Mangle and Toy Freddy?"

Bonnie: "One's a dumbass, and one's just plain lonely. But they're-"

Goldie's phone starts ringing.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Vincent?! Why the hell are you calling me! I'm interviewing Bonnie!"

Stage Crew Vincent: "I put ipecac in your coffee..."

Goldie spits out her coffee

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ipecac?! How much did you put and why would you do that?!"

Stage Crew Vincent: "The whole bottle... Hehe..."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh, shit..."

Suddenly, Goldie puts her hand over her mouth and runs offstage

BonnieBunBun: "Ok, on with the show! So, Bonnie, I have a present from Freddy for you!"

Bonnie: "Ooh! Ooh! What is it?"

BonnieBunBun hands Bonnie the gift. She opens it, revealing a diamond encrusted red bowtie.

Bonnie: "OH MY GOD! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH FREDDY!"

BonnieBunBun: "Wait, your boyfriend's parents are millionaires?!"

Bonnie: "Yeah!"

BonnieBunBun stares in disbelief.

Bonnie: "What?"

Meanwhile, backstage...

GoldieTheFazbear: "HULLLEEEEEHHH!"

Goldie is violently sick and hurls into a bucket backstage. Stage crew crowds around her.

Stage Crew Mike: "Uh, did someone talk about sex out there?"

Stage Crew Vincent: "Hehe"

GoldieTheFazbear: "SCREW YOU VINCENT! YOU'RE FIRED!"

Stage Crew Jeremy: "Whoa, what happened out there?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS- HULEEEHHHH!"

Security guards kick Vincent out of the studio.

BonnieBunBun: "Uh, anyway... HOW DID YOU GET A MILLIONAIRE BOYFRIEND?"

BonnieBunBun picks up Bonnie and shakes her until she starts crying.

Bonnie: "NOO! STOP IT! FREDDY HELP ME!"

BonnieBunBun: "HE'S-NOT-COMING!"

Suddenly, Freddy bursts onto the stage, security guards chasing him down.

Freddy: "PUT DOWN MY GIRLFRIEND, YOU $ *& #!&#%& *$# %$& **# ^ #!

Obscenities fly out of Freddy's mouth, and everyone gasps.

BonnieBunBun: Sorry! I was just wondering-"

Freddy: "Just wondering? Just wondering if I would let you torture her?!"

BonnieBunBun: "NO! Wondering how she got a millionaire boyfriend!"

Freddy: "Because she's way hotter, prettier, and smarter than you, you BITCH!"

BonnieBunBun gulps nervously. Goldie comes back out, not sick anymore.

GoldieTheFazbear: "SECURITY! GET THIS LITTLE ABOMINATION OUT OF THE STUDIO! I NEVER WANT TO SEE HIM AGAIN!"

Bonnie gasps and protests, but to no avail

Bonnie: "HE'S NOT AN ABOMINATION! I LOVE HIM!"

Fritz, the security guard, ignores her and carries a screaming Freddy offstage and throws him out the back door. He lands face-first into the dumpster.

Bonnie: "NOOO! FREDDY!"

Bonnie runs out the door.

Freddy: "OH SCREW YOU, GOLDIE, YOU #* &$%*#*$ $#!"

Goldie slams the door in Freddy's face, trapping both Bonnie and Freddy outside.

GoldieTheFazbear: "There! NOW GET THE FUCK OUT!"

Her screams are met with silence, but rustling noises from outside sound.

BonnieBunBun: "What the fuck is going on out there?"

Stage Crew Mike looks through the peephole

Stage Crew Mike: "Uh, you might wanna chase them even further than that..."

GoldieTheFazbear: "What? What the hell is wrong with you?"

Goldie opens the door, only to reveal Freddy kissing Bonnie- ON THE LIPS- right outside the door.

GoldieTheFazbear: "I TOLD YOU TO GET THE FUCK OUT!"

Bonnie: "Freddy?"

Freddy: "Run!"

Bonnie and Freddy run into the distance. Goldie doubles over and hurls into the already-full bucket, causing vomit to spill over the sides and get absolutely everywhere.

GoldieTheFazbear: "FUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKK!"


	5. Foxy, ft Springtrapper

The next day, Goldie continues interviewing the Fazgang.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh, god, please tell me nobody liked the last interview yesterday,"

Audience all cheers, and Goldie slams her fist on the table.

GoldieTheFazbear: "SHUT UP!"

Audience stops

GoldieTheFazbear: "Finally! Anyway, I've brought in another special guest. She is one of my friends in the animatronic world, please welcome Springtrapper!"

A gold animatronic wearing a black bowtie walks on the stage. Everyone cheers

GoldieTheFazbear: "Sup, Springtrapper?"

Springtrapper: "Eh, not much. Just wanted to stop by and see who you were interviewing."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh, well, in that case, you might not like him,"

Springtrapper: "Why? Who is it?"

Goldie facepalms.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ok, guys, bring him in,"

Foxy saunters onto the stage.

Foxy: "Yo, guys!"

Audience goes wild.

Foxy turns his head to Springtrapper.

Foxy: "And who is this hottie over here?"

Audience laughs

Springtrapper: "Shut up!"

Foxy purrs sexily. Springtrapper glares at his perverted display.

Foxy: "Ooh, she's got an attitude! How 'bout you come over to my place?"

Audience oohs

Springtrapper: "GOD DAMN IT! I SAID TO SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Yeah, I can definitely see what everyone was telling me,"

Foxy continues to flirt with Springtrapper, who is about to slap him in the face.

GoldieTheFazbear: "FOXY! STOP IT! I'M HERE TO INTERVIEW YOU, SO FOCUS, GOD DAMN IT!"

Springtrapper groans

Springtrapper: "THANK YOU!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Anyway, what do you think of everyone at school?"

Foxy: "In general, pretty hot! Hehe."

GoldieTheFazbear: "SERIOUSLY! FOCUS! ARE YOU FUCKING DEAF?"

Audience laughs

Foxy: "But, oh, god, I FUCKING HATE THAT FAZBASTARD FREDDY! He thinks he can steal my girl and get away with it? Not gonna happen!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "What about Chica?"

Foxy: "She's such a crybaby, but in bed? Oh, yeah, I'd do her. I'd do her so hard that she won't even be able to-"

Springtrapper- "STOP!"

Foxy: "But you- I'd pound you even harder! Oh god YES! I'd rattle it in there just enough-"

Springtrapper: "FUCK OFF!"

Springtrapper gets up and slaps Foxy hard across the face. Foxy howls out a fox's mating call.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Yeah, I wouldn't recommend slapping him, he's kind of a sadomasochist,"

Springtrapper: "Oh dear god..."

Goldie groans, but continues on with the interview.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ugh, what about the other Fazbear?"

Foxy: "Goldie? Nah, he's an annoying smartass. But at least he didn't try to steal Bonnie from me,"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Uh huh. What about the Toys?"

Foxy: "Oh, god! All of them are motherfuckers, but Toy Bonnie and Toy Chica? GOD! They're so hot! I would totally-"

Goldie the Fazbear: "CUT THE SHIT OUT ALREADY!"

Foxy: "Anyway. Toy Freddy is a fucking retard. I mean, come on! Who would want to have sex with that guy?"

Goldie and Springtrapper both groan simultaneously. Springtrapper whispers something to Goldie.

Springtrapper: "How about after the interview, we torture him and kick him out?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "I like your thinking,"

Foxy: "Anyways, Mangle? Nah, I wouldn't bang her that hard. Not enough sex appeal. She does not please me, uh uh! But I would still do her, she's kinda hot."

GoldieTheFazbear: "I take it you think that every girl at school is hot?"

Foxy: "Hell yeah, but nobody is as nearly as hot as this hottie, Springtrapper! You know what? I wanna do you right now!"

Springtrapper: "OH MY FUCKING GOD!"

Suddenly, Springtrapper's eyes glow red and start to bleed. Her fur begins to rip off on her limbs, and across her left eye, showing her endoskeleton.

Foxy: "Oh, god! I don't wanna bang that!"

Nightmare Springtrapper: "I'M GONNA KILL YOU, YOU LITTLE PERVERT! GET THE FUCK BACK HERE!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Yeah, I think I'll help you."

Goldie and Springtrapper begin to beat Foxy up

Foxy: "OH GOD, NO, THAT IS NOT-PLEASURABLE- OW! MOTHERFUCKERS!"

Audience goes hysterical

Springtrapper reverts to her normal form.

Springtrapper: "NOW GET OUT, YOU FUCKING BASTARD!"

Goldie and Springtrapper throw Foxy out the back door.

Foxy: "B-but I wanted to do you! What happened?"

Springtrapper changes back to Nightmare Springtrapper

Nightmare Springtrapper: "OUT! NOW!"

Seeing her in the nightmare form, Foxy runs off.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Yeah, I think we all need a break from that perverted psychopath, don't we?"

Audience and Springtrapper nods.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Anyway, let's give a big shoutout to my friend Springtrapper, who put up a great fight against that pervert!"

Springtrapper: "Thanks, guys!"

Audience cheers wildly.

Curtain closes. Yep, we're done. SO FAR.


	6. Chica, Or Not

After an hour, the curtains open.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ugh, you guys. So we'll be interviewing the crybaby next, I think I might as well kill myself now,"

Audience laughs

GoldieTheFazbear: "Not funny!"

Audience stops

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ok, yeah. We're ready. OK GUYS, BRING HER IN!"

Stage Crew Jeremy: "Uh, we're having a bit of a problem here!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "JUST BRING HER IN"

Mike and Jeremy come on stage, carrying a screaming and crying Chica.

Chica: "NOOO! PUT ME BACK! T-THE STAGE IS- IS SCARY! WAAAAHHH!"

Goldie facepalms

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ugh, here, take this pacifier,"

Goldie stuffs a pacifier into Chica's mouth, and she immediately calms down

GoldieTheFazbear: "So, what do you-"

Chica hears a loud noise and starts bawling.

Chica: "DON'T YELL AT ME!"

Audience groans.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ugh, ok suck on this thing,"

Goldie gives Chica a baby bottle, but Chica is inconsolable.

GoldieTheFazbear: "MIKE! JEREMY! WE KINDA HAVE A PROBLEM HERE!"

Mike takes one single look at Chica and walks off.

Stage Crew Jeremy: "Oh fuck me,"

Jeremy carries a screaming Chica offstage. Chica throws a fit and kicks him in the face, knocking him over.

A sickening crash sounds.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Uhh, that doesn't sound too good,"

Goldie takes a look backstage and sees Jeremy passed out.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Yeah, we can't do this right now. We'll be right back with another of the preschoolers,"

TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES

PLEASE STAND BY


	7. Toy Bonnie, ft Savion

Half an hour later, Goldie reappears.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ok, this interview was one that I was hoping wouldn't happen, but anyway, we have another one of my friends here, please welcome Savion the Panda!"

A tall, red eyed panda wearing karate gi walks in.

Savion: "Hey guys!"

Audience cheers.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Yeah, hey Savion! Jut sayin', you might wanna watch out for the interviewee,"

Savion: "Uhh, why exactly?"

All of a sudden, shrieks sound backstage

Toy Bonnie: "Ugh! Get me out of here! This place is filthy- YOU'RE SMEARING MY MAKEUP!"

Toy Bonnie stomps on stage.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Anyway, this is-"

Toy Bonnie: "Shh. Honey, let the princess speak for herself,"

Toy Bonnie puts her hand over Goldie's mouth

Toy Bonnie: "I am Toy Bonnie, the most beautiful rabbit on this planet. I expect all of you to bow before me and do what I say!"

Savion: "That's debatable..."

Toy Bonnie: "Oh, and who is this plebian over here? He looks like he needs a haircut!"

Savion: "Wow, that's nice."

GoldieTheFazbear: "JUST DO THE DAMN INTERVIEW TOY BONNIE!"

Toy Bonnie: "Excuse me, darling?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "We're doing an interview, genius!"

Audience laughs

Toy Bonnie: "Oh, well, why don't you go put on some makeup first? I'm sure your eyes will appreciate it!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh, well why don't you go burn off your face? I'm sure everyone in the universe will appreciate it! Especially Bonnie!"

Audience cheers

Toy Bonnie: "WHAT! HOW DARE YOU HUMILIATE ME LIKE THIS? AND DON'T YOU DARE COMPARE ME TO THAT UGLY-ASS BITCH!"

Savion: "CALM DOWN!"

Toy Bonnie: "FINE! I'LL ANSWER THE GODDAMN QUESTIONS!"

GoldieTheFazbear: *scoffs* "Fine! Who are some of your friends from school?"

Toy Bonnie: "Oh, well only Toy Chica, since she's almost as hot as I am,"

Savion: "Isn't it kinda shallow to do that?"

Toy Bonnie: "Oh, please. I know what I'm doing."

Goldie groans.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Anyway, what about the Fazgang...

Toy Bonnie: "OH MY FUCKING GOD! I HATE THEM SO MUCH!"

Savion: "Wait, what?"

Audience boos

Toy Bonnie: "All of them- They're all ugly-ass losers that don't have a life! There's something called MAKEUP, and BONNIE AND CHICA SHOULD TOTALLY LEARN TO USE IT. Oh, and Goldie's a goddamn smartass who thinks that I'm ugly! What kind of IDIOT thinks that about me? I FUCKING HATE THEM- YOU HEAR ME?! ALL OF THEM!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Well, there's only one way to settle this,"

Goldie reaches into her pocket and pulls out a tranquilizer dart.

Savion: "WHOA! No need for violence, Goldie."

GoldieTheFazbear: "She's gonna tear down the whole set,"

Toy Bonnie: "AAARRGH! I HATE THEM SO MUCH!"

Toy Bonnie picks up a chair and throws it at a set piece, knocking it over.

Goldie loads her tranquilizer gun and sets her finger on the trigger.

Savion: "WAIT! DON'T SHOOT!"

Goldie freezes

GoldieTheFazbear: "?"

Toy Bonnie: "?"

Everyone else: "?"

Savion: "Come on, guys! I know how to solve this!"

Toy Bonnie groans

Savion: "So, you like massages?"

Toy Bonnie: "Well, you're smarter than you look,"

Savion walks over to Toy Bonnie and starts giving her a shoulder massage to calm her down

Toy Bonnie: "Hey! Careful with my- Huh, not bad, actually. This actually feels kinda... nice, i guess?"

Goldie stares.

GoldieTheFazbear: "H-HOW?! WHAT KIND OF SORCERY IS THIS?"

Savion: "It's the sorcery of getting people to calm down!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Wow, so you actually got Satan to calm down,"

Toy Bonnie: "Oh, I'm prettier than Satan, darling,"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Whatever. So, what is so bad about the Fazgang?"

Toy Bonnie: "Oh, well, they're just plebeians with no sense of fashion whatsoever, and none of them are that good looking,"

Savion: "Who's the worst of all of them?"

Toy Bonnie: "Well, obviously Bonnie- I mean, she can't take Freddy away from me! And she's definitely not that pretty..."

GoldieTheFazbear: *whispers to Savion* "I think the plan is working..."

Savion steps away from Toy Bonnie

Savion: "Oh yeah, I can calm even the craziest bitch in the world down. Now if only you called me in during Golden Freddy's interview,"

Audience remembers Golden Freddy and laughs

Toy Bonnie: "Anyhow, Freddy- ahh, he's the man of my dreams! I just wish that he would notice me, AND STOP MAKING OUT WITH THAT LITTLE PURPLE BITCH!"

Toy Bonnie snatches Goldie's SECOND mug and shatters it on the floor

GoldieTheFazbear: "OH MY FUCKING GOD! THAT COST ME 50 DOLLARS, YOU LITTLE FUCKTARD!"

Toy Bonnie: "DON'T YOU CALL ME A FUCKTARD YOU LITTLE BITCH! YOU DON'T EVEN WEAR MAKEUP!"

Savion pulls out a bottle filled with something, presumably green tea. Toy Bonnie drinks the contents, and immediately calms down.

Savion: "Calm down, it's not that bad."

Toy Bonnie: "B-but she stole my man!"

Toy Bonnie starts crying, streaking her makeup

Savion: "Ok. Picture this. Is Freddy perfect?"

Toy Bonnie: "N-no…"

Savion: "Is he the hottest man alive?"

Toy Bonnie: "No!"

Savion: "Is he good enough for you?!"

Toy Bonnie: "NO! HE'S NOT!"

Savion: "That's right! Now go find yourself a new man!"

Toy Bonnie: "YEAH! I'M OVER YOU, FREDDY! I FUCKING HATE YOU!"

Savion: "THAT'S THE SPIRIT!"

Toy Bonnie: "But my makeup!"

Savion: "Ugh. Hold on, I'll be back."

Savion runs offstage promptly

GoldieTheFazbear: "Uh, what about Chica?"

Toy Bonnie: "Um, she is SUCH a crybaby! I mean, she would cry over the TINIEST things in the world! If you put makeup on her she would cry... "

GoldieTheFazbear: "What about-"

Savion runs back on stage holding a tube of mascara and some makeup remover

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ya gonna put that on, you gaylord?'

Audience laughs

Savion: "WTF Goldie?!"

Toy Bonnie: "OOH! OOH! ME WANTS!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Naw, I'm just joking. Right guys?"

Audience cheers.

Savion: "Anyway. Toy Bonnie, I just went and stole a tube of mascara from wardrobe, so"

Toy Bonnie: "OH MY GOD THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!"

Toy Bonnie redoes her makeup and calms down, FINALLY…

GoldieTheFazbear: "So, you're calm now?"

Toy Bonnie: "Mhm."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Err, what about Foxy?"

Toy Bonnie: "Well, I guess he's kinda hot, but again, he has his eyes on Bonnie…"

Savion: "Well, does anyone actually like, LIKE you?"

Toy Bonnie: "Sadly, no. They don't know what they're missing out on."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Um, how's Toy Freddy?"

Toy Bonnie: "He's more cute than hot, but he could DEFINITELY afford to drop like 50 pounds,"

Audience laughs

Savion: "How much exactly does he weigh?"

Goldie pulls out Fazbear Daycare records

GoldieTheFazbear: "Okay… according to this record, he weighs… 60 pounds, OMFG

Savion: "And what, he's only 4?"

Toy Bonnie: "Yep!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Well, if he dropped that much weight then he would die…"

Toy Bonnie: "Oh GOD NO! I mean, he's super nice, so OBVIOUSLY I don't want him to die!"

Audience: "SHIP SHIP SHIP SHIP!"

Toy Bonnie: "Oh, COME ON!"

Savion: "There's still one more called Mangle, right?"

Toy Bonnie: "Oh, right. She does know how to use makeup, like REALLY well, but she doesn't really fit in with anybody- She's kinda nice, I guess?"

Savion: "Well, you might wanna try getting to know her better,"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Fair point,"

Toy Bonnie: "Yeah, I probably could. Anyway, so this thing's done?"

Savion: "Apparently, yeah!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Alright, this is it for this interview! Everyone give a HUGE round of applause to Toy Bonnie- And ESPECIALLY Savion the Savior!"

Savion: "Heh heh. Bye guys!"

Audience cheers LOUDLY

And the curtain closes.


	8. Chica, ft Trigger

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh my fucking god, that… was… crazy!"

Audience cheers

GoldieTheFazbear: "So, we're gonna, well, resume with Chica…"

Everyone groans. A sniffling Chica walks out on stage.

Chica: "D-do I have to come out?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Yes."

Chica: "BUT IT'S SCARY!"

Chica bursts into tears once again.

GoldieTheFazbear: "That's exactly why I called in another friend, Trigger!"

A tiger wearing a black shirt, blue shorts, and a cap saying, "ROCK OUT, DUDE!" walks onto the stage.

Trigger: "It's okay, Chica. They're just people."

Chica: "P-people? Not a big scary monster?"

Trigger: "No, no, no! They're pretty much harmless.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ok, Chica. So can you come over here?"

Chica shakily walks to the center of the stage and sits down.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ok. So, Chica, whad'dya think of all the bitches at school?

Chica: "What does bitch mean?"

Trigger: "Try not to swear…"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh my fucking god,"

Trigger: "She's just a kid!"

Chica: "What does fucking mean?"

Audience laughs

Trigger: "Thanks for listening, Goldie."

Goldie facepalms

GoldieTheFazbear: "WHO DO YOU HATE AT SCHOOL"

Chica: "Umm, Foxy's really creepy and he's really mean to Freddy. He also loves Bonnie and I don't know, wants to have sex with her?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Riiighhhht... He wants to fuck her..."

Trigger: "GOLDIE!"

Chica: "I still don't know what that means, but I think Goldie does."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh yeah, he knows like every obscenity in the English Language,"

Trigger: "Who even taught him to cuss like that?!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Idk, not me!"

Audience laughs

Chica: "But he's really funny. I don't know why people think he's a meanie, he can actually be kinda nice sometimes,"

Random fanboy: "I SHIP IT!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Hm. Still a better love story than Twilight."

Audience laughs

Trigger: "C'mon, Goldie! Let's not introduce her to love!"

Chica: "What?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Whatever, what about Bonnie?"

Chica: "She's the bestest friend ever! We're gonna be friends forever and ever!"

Audience awwws

Trigger: "That's sweet!"

Chica: "Yeah! But I don't like when she does weird stuff with Freddy, it looks weird."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Wait, Freddy's banging Bonnie?!"

Trigger: "GOLDIE"

Chica: "Umm, I don't know, but they do mouth stuff way too much."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh, yeah. Kissing's gross."

Trigger: "People are dating in preschool?!"

Chica: "I- guess? But I don't wanna!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Good. So what about the two boys?"

Chica: "Freddy and Foxy?"

Trigger: "Yup. Just tell us about them!"

Chica: "Well, Freddy's kinda nice, but he's always k-kis what again?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Kiss…"

Chica: "Yeah, he always does the weird thing. But Foxy is SO MEAN! One time-he tripped me- and I FELL!"

Chica remembers what happened and starts bawling.

Trigger: "Don't cry, Chica. It'll be okay."

Chica: "NO IT'S NOT!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Forget about that perv-ass fuckboy already!"

Trigger: "Screw that fox. He won't matter in the future!"

Chica: "B-but when's the future?"

Goldie facepalms as Chica continues to cry

Trigger: "J-just, here,"

Trigger hands Chica a bottle filled with apple juice. Chica sniffles and starts to drink it.

Chica: "I hate him though!"

Trigger: "Didn't he like, cause technical difficulties on one of the episodes?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Yeah, he tried to bang someone..."

Chica: "Bang? Like this?"

Chica makes two figures with her hands and violently smashes them together.

Trigger, GoldieTheFazbear: "OH GOD NOOOOO!"

Audience groans in disgust

GoldieTheFazbear: "A-anyway! On with this… What about the Toys?"

Chica: "They're even meaner than Foxy!"

Trigger: "Like…..how?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "They're all whores! And you know what? If it wasn't for Savion I WOULD HAVE SLAPPED THAT GOD DAMN BITCH STRAIGHT ACROSS THE FACE! SHE SHOULD BURN IN MOTHERFUCKING HELL, THAT LITTLE CU-"

Goldie rages about how much she hates Toy Bonnie

Trigger: "Omg stahp swearing!"

Trigger pulls out a roll of tape and slaps a strip of it over Goldie's mouth. He hesitates, but then proceeds to tape her to a chair.

GoldieTheFazbear: "MMMPPHHHH!"

Goldie struggles angrily in her chair

Trigger: "Sorry, but I kinda don't want Chica to pick up this stuff!"

Chica points at Goldie and laughs.

Chica: "So, are we gonna finish this fucking interview?"

Audience gasps.

Goldie: "MMMPH! MMMPH!"

Goldie flails violently, but somehow discharges her tranquilizer dart gun in the process.

Goldie: "M-m-"

Goldie collapses in the chair.

Chica: "Wait, what?"

Trigger: "Idk, but why are they so mean?"

Chica: "They always call you mean names like "ugly", but they aren't even that pretty themselves!"

Trigger: "Sheesh! Does Miss Higgins not know about this?"

Chica: "She doesn't even care! Anyhow, Toy Freddy isn't that bad, he's just not really that smart…."

Trigger: "Okay…exactly how stupid? And isn't there also another girl?"

Chica: "He's, pretty stupid- I guess. Also kinda fat. And yeah. There's Mangle. She doesn't talk much."

Trigger: "That's…good to know. One last question: Do you like going to Fazbear Preschool?"

Chica: "Sure! The field trips are super fun! WE'RE GOING TO THE ROLLER RINK NEXT AAAAAAAHHH!"

Chica squeals in excitement. Goldie's chair tips and falls over with a sickening crash.

Audience groans. Trigger scratches his head nervously.

Trigger: "Yeah, well…Thanks for watching! And thanks to you, Chica!"

Chica waves to the audience, which cheers loudly

Curtains close


	9. Toy Freddy, ft Thomas Reynard

Curtains open, but Goldie is still knocked out and tied to a chair

Audience laughs

Suddenly, Goldie snaps awake

GoldieTheFazbear: "Huh? W-wha-Huh?"

She looks down and sees that she is tied down

GoldieTheFazbear: "W-wait, what the FUCK happened here? Guys, did someone like- rape me or something?"

Audience laughs

Random audience member: "Nope!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh thank god. Well…"

Goldie struggles in her chair for a bit and eventually gets out.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Well, according to Mike, SOMEONE'S interview is gonna be delayed because they're having a meltdown in makeup…"

Audience laughs

GoldieTheFazbear: "Yeah this isn't working…Well, uhh… THOMAS GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE!"

Thomas Reynard, a pretty normal looking human walks onto stage, confused

Thomas: "Wait, what the hell?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "?"

Thomas: "I thought I was supposed to come on 30 minutes later?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Well, she's being a bitch right now..."

Audience boos Toy Chica

Thomas: "...Anyway. So who's the interviewee right now?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Yeah... COME OUT TOY FATSO!"

A loud thump sounds from backstage.

Thomas: "Goldie, did you bring a freakin' ELEPHANT into the studio?!"

Audience laughs

GoldieTheFazbear: "Nah, he's just fat. As far as I know he holds the Fazbear World Record for "Most Pizza Eaten by a 4 year old..."

Thomas: "Exactly HOW much?"

GoldieTheFazbear: *flatly* "134 slices..."

Audience cheers (Idk why XD)

Another thump sounds. An extremely overweight bear plods toward a nearby chair.

Thomas: "Holy... How is his heart still functioning?"

Toy Freddy makes another step towards Goldie and Thomas. However, he tilts forward and falls over with a sickening crash. He has sunken through a floorboard.

Toy Freddy: "I'm okay! I think..."

He sees that his arm is bleeding.

Toy Freddy; "Yeah, I'm ok!"

Goldie facepalms

Thomas: "Must I really?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Really... What?"

Thomas groans and says something. Toy Freddy somehow magically floats out of the hole and into the air

*Cue Blue Danube music! Like the famous part*

Like I'd seriously recommend putting this on during this scene. It's pretty funny XD

( /watch?v=EHt2tW_nvp8) Yeah, just type youtube . com in front of that...

Toy Freddy: "Wow! Am I flying?"

Thomas: *dryly* "Yes kid. You're flying."

Toy Freddy: "Woah! This is soooo cool! I can actually move around!"

Toy Freddy begins to fly towards the audience.

Audience cheers!

Thomas: "Don't go that way..."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Thomas, let him down!"

Toy Freddy: "Wheee! This is so fun!"

Toy Freddy begins to ascend into the air

Thomas: "Come back here! You're getting out of hand!"

Toy Freddy: "But it's so fun! I'm flying!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Now or never..."

Toy Freddy: "Look! I'm a bird!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "He's gonna break the ceiling if he goes any higher!"

Toy Freddy: "I can't believe it!"

Thomas holds out his hands and levitates Toy Freddy back onto the stage, 2 inches above his chair.

Toy Freddy: "I've been waiting for this to happen since-"

Thomas stops casting the spell, resulting in Toy Freddy falling onto his chair. The chair trembles- and snaps under his weight.

GoldieTheFazbear: "HOLY FUCKING SHIT-"

Stage Crew Mike: "Uhh, that's the strongest chair we have..."

Thomas: "How- How do you even- function?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Just sit on the floor..."

Toy Freddy plops down on the ground. The whole stage shakes.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Anyway, I'm here to interview you about-"

Toy Freddy: What does intervention mean?"

Thomas groans

GoldieTheFazbear: "My fucking god... What is- WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT FREDDY FAZBEAR?"

Toy Freddy: "Well, he's like, super rich. Like he has a house- that's bigger than the sky!"

Audience laughs

Thomas: "Kid, that's impossible!"

Toy Freddy: "Sure! Whatever implausible means!"

Thomas: "My god... What about Goldie..."

GoldieTheFazbear: "What?"

Thomas facepalms

Thomas: "Golden Freddy!"

Toy Freddy: "Oh, he's very fucking sweary. I mean, it's not good to fucking swear!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "You kidding me right now?"

Thomas: "Yeah.. It's not fucking good to swear,"

Audience laughs

GoldieTheFazbear: "Anyway... Bonnie?"

Toy Freddy: "Well, she's kinda pretty- I guess! I do wanna date her, but Freddy's got her."

Thomas: "That's too bad. Welp, I wish you eternal luck on actually getting a girl."

Toy Freddy: "But imma date her anyway,"

GoldieTheFazbear: "That's not how it works..."

Toy Freddy: *angrily* "THAT'S NOT HOW YOUR MOM WORKS!"

Audience oohs

Thomas: "Damn, that kid's got some balls!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Uhh... What about Chica?"

Toy Freddy: "One total pissbaby. I bet the ocean is made from her tears!"

Thomas: "Actually, the ocean was created more than 4 billion years ago when-"

Toy Freddy: "Hey! Shut your pussy!"

Thomas: *offended* "WHAT?!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "He doesn't even have one! But Foxy might..."

Toy Freddy: "Oh yeah. Foxy loves banging. Whatever that is. BANG BANG!"

Toy Freddy smashes his hands together in an even more violent way than Chica

Same Random Audience Member: "YEAH! WRECK THAT PUSSY!"

Thomas, Goldie: "OH MY GOD!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "You did the same thing that Chica did!"

Thomas: "My god! You are a disgusting person!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh god, what about the other Toys..."

Toy Freddy: "Oh, Toy Bonnie's mean. Like mean. Real mean. Meaner than your mom."

Audience laughs

Thomas: "Okay? T-that's good to know."

Toy Freddy: "And well, Toy Chica wears a ton of mailman on her face. Also a bitch."

Thomas: "Well, thanks for just imprinting that image into my mind. Forever..."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Makeup... *under her breath* Dumbass..."

Toy Freddy: "And Mangle. Nah, she don't talk much. "

Thomas. Alright, so is that all?"

Toy Freddy: "Sure! Ooh! I didn't know that you were wearing a hat!"

Toy Freddy notices Thomas's hat and jumps up on Goldie to reach it.

GoldieTheFazbear: *strained* "AH-HELP-ME"

Thomas: "Hey! Don't touch that! It's very-"

Toy Freddy snatches the hat, revealing fox ears on Thomas's head.

Thomas: "Important..."

GoldieTheFazbear: "CAN'T-BREATHE..."

Goldie collapses

Toy Freddy jumps up on Thomas's chair, causing it to tremble violently.

Toy Freddy: "Hey, what are those?" (Me: WHAT ARE THOSE)

Toy Freddy begins to pull on his ears.

Thomas: "NO! GET OFF OF ME!"

Thomas takes back his hat. A blinding white beam appears at his hands. Thomas blasts Toy Freddy into a wall with the beam.

Toy Freddy: "That was fun!"

Audience laughs. Thomas shakes his head and puts his hat back on.

Thomas: "Anyway... Goldie?"

He sees Goldie unconscious.

Thomas: "Well... This is awkward... So, b-"

Toy Freddy: "BYE. BITCHES!"

Curtains close.


	10. Toy Chica, ft Mari

**Damn, Goldie! Back at it with the late night fanfic writing sessions!**

 **This is like the only way I can get 2 chapters in per day XD**

 **BUT:**

 **LAST CALLS FOR A MANGLE INTERVIEW! IT IS NOT TAKEN AND IS THE ONLY FULL INTERVIEW LEFT!**

 **ALSO TAKING REQUESTS FOR BACKSTAGE CONVOS! (PLZ READ THE SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT)  
**

 **Thanks!** **  
**

 **-Goldie**

* * *

The next day

Goldie is wearing a cast and a spinal halo.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh, don't worry. Nothing too bad happened to me,"

Audience stares.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh, just a punctured lung, fractured vertebrae, a spinal cord injury, and a shattered ulna. Told you, nothing bad!"

Audience laughs.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Anyway, thanks, Thomas. The lucky bastard actually did better than any doctor has. Well, Mari, I guess you could come out now,"

A black cat wearing a blue shirt and jeans sashays onto the stage. She has a seemingly painful scar on her right eye and is holding a sword.

Mari takes a single look at Goldie and grimaces

Mari: "Whoa, damn! The fuck happened to you?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Well, some fatass decided to sit on my neck and almost killed me. That was great..."

Mari: "Holy shit! Anyway, so who's up next?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "I don't think you're gonna like her,"

Toy Chica saunters out into the spotlight.

Toy Chica: "I deserve better than this crappy place! I DESERVE TO BE A HOLLYWOOD STAR ALREADY!"

Toy Chica flaunts her crop top

Mari: "Whoa, whoa! Who's this little whore?"

Toy Chica: "Excuse me? Who's this ugly bitch?"

Mari: "OH HELL NO, YOU LITTLE CUNT!"

Toy Chica: "WHO ARE YOU CALLING A CUNT?

Mari: "YOU WANNA GO MANO Y MANO? HUH?"

Mari whips out her sword and twirls it around.

GoldieTheFazbear: "OK EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

Both Mari and Toy Chica stare.

Mari: "Bruh! That was uncalled for!"

Toy Chica: "You can't tell me to shut up!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Ugh, Toy Chica. Please tell me, what do you think about the Fazgang?"

Toy Chica: "Oh my god, ugly as fuck. Screw them, they can go burn in hell for as long as they can!"

Mari: "I do like the phrase "Burn in Hell","

Toy Chica: "Don't interrupt the Queen! Anyway, everyone says that Freddy's so damn hot, but he's just a desperate fuckboy looking for a girl. And a life."

Audience laughs

Mari: "You're a queen? Seriously?"

Toy Chica: "Yup! And you know what? Freddy can go fuck off,"

Mari: "I mean, I did watch the other episodes before this. Fair point?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Definitely a fuckboy,"

Toy Chica: "Yeah! And I really hate to admit it, but I think Bonnie deserves better that that sewer rat!"

Mari and Goldie snicker.

Mari: *whispers to Goldie* "She's actually pretty good at insults,"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh yeah. They're all pretty good. So what about Bonnie then?"

Toy Chica: "Nah, she's super unfashionable and plain. She also doesn't use makeup, which is a dumb move,"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Freddy gave her so many diamonds..."

Mari: "Why? Ya jealous?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Um, no. Just- How does he afford those?"

Toy Chica: "Easy! Once he's got his pathetic little eyes on somebody, he'll do anything- even stab himself- to get her attention! Fuckboy..."

Mari: "Damn! That must be one douch-y family he's in..."

Toy Chica: "Well, Golden Freddy's not really into that stuff."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Obviously, he's a total badass!"

Mari: "He sounds awesome as fuck!"

Toy Chica: "He's a dick, but you know? Dicks gonna be dicks. At least he's better than Freddy."

Mari: "Didn't he- like, murder someone before?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Nah, that was just Mike. But he's still alive!

Mike sticks his head out of the curtains

Stage Crew Mike: "HEY PEEPS!"

Audience cheers

Toy Chica: "Hmm. Chica- She's really wimpy and pathetic."

Mari: "Why, is she bawling her eyes out 24/7?"

Toy Chica: "Ugh, tell me about it! She's probably never gonna get a guy, unless it's Foxy. That guy'll bang anything!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "What, did he like, bang one of your clothes mannequins?"

Toy Chica: "Yep!"

Mari: "Foxy's a perv-ass fuckboy? Well, that explains a lot."

Goldie, Toy Chica: "Explains what?"

Mari: "This,"

Mari holds up a small, board like object.

Toy Chica: "What is that, like a bit of cardboard?

Mari: "Nope. Foxy's underwear..."

Mari throws it to the ground and it shatters.

Audience laughs

GoldieTheFazbear: "Holy motherfuck- HOW DOES HE PRODUCE SO MUCH SPERM?!"

Mari: *freaked out* "I DON'T EVEN FUCKING KNOW!"

Toy Chica: "Where did you even get that?"

Mari: *flatly* "Wardrobe."

Toy Chica: "Yeah, he's a gross perv! Like he goes after any girl he sees! One time he even tried to force his thing into Bonnie!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Okay..."

Mari: "Do you have like, a BFF? Best Fucking Friends?"

Toy Chica: "Yeah, Toy Bonnie, I guess?"

Mari: "I-guess?"

Toy Chica: "Yeah. She kinda forces me into everything I do."

GoldieTheFazbear: "She was a TOTAL bitch on the show. Had about 1,000,000 meltdowns. How did you even calm down though? I thought you were like, super snobby!"

Toy Chica: "I guess I DO have opinions like Mari's?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Hmm. Well, good to hear."

Mari: "I keep forgetting, who's the fucktard again? You know, the fat dumbass?"

Toy Chica: "Ohh. Toy Freddy. Riiight. What a fucktard. Seriously, he is SO DAMN STUPID!"

Mari: "Keep going..."

Toy Chica: "He didn't even know what 1+1 is! And he said that it was a door..."

GoldieTheFazbear: "How dumb can you get?"

Mari: "Clearly, dumber than a pig,"

Toy Chica: "And Mangle? Well, she's kinda weird. I don't know if she smokes weed or not. That's kind of a popular myth around school!"

Mari: "I'd assume not? Hopefully not!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Children these days... Hopeless,"

Audience laughs

GoldieTheFazbear: "But kids, remember: SMOKE WEED EVERYDAY!"

Mari: "FUCK YEAH!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Anyway, it's over!"

Toy Chica: "That actually wasn't that bad- I suppose.

Mari: "You know what? You're not such a bitch after all."

Toy Chica: "And you're actually pretty damn badass!"

GoldieTheFazbear: *in narrator's voice* "And thus, two enemies- became friends, and all was well. The end!"

Some Dick: "HEY SHUT THE FUCK UP GOLDIE!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "YOU SHUT UP BITCH! I'M DONE!"

Audience cheers

Curtains close.


	11. Mangle, ft Myra

35 MILLION YEARS LATER...

Curtains open.

GoldieTheFazbear: "Yeesh. That- was MAYBE the smoothest interview I've had in a while..."

Audience nods in agreement.

GoldieTheFazbear: "God-My neck is still killing me- THANKS AGAIN, DUMBASS!"

Audience boos Toy Freddy.

GoldieTheFazbear: "But as they say- The show must go on! So anyways, we have our final official interview today, so Mangle? Why don't you get your ass out here and show us how to- I-I mean... Come out here- Please..."

Audience laughs

Mangle: *offstage* "M-me? B-but I don't want to..."

Myra: "C'mon, ya wussy! Just get out there and do it!"

A cat with blue eyes and light purple fur wearing a white crop top and a pink miniskirt shoves Mangle out onstage.

Mangle: *whimpers*

GoldieTheFazbear: "Oh, sorry guys. Didn't tell you that Myra was coming on today.

Myra: "Wait- You didn't tell them? YOU DIDN'T FREAKING TELL TH- I'm just kidding!

GoldieTheFazbear: *squints* "Just noticed, you look kinda like a crossover of Toy Chica and Candy the Cat..."

Myra: "Psh! I'm hotter than them both! So anyways, is she- y'know, actually gonna talk?"

Myra points at Mangle and shoots her a questioning look

GoldieTheFazbear: "Hmm... That could be done by testing out one rumor... Well, I went FAR out of town to get some of this shit!"

Goldie pulls out a dried-up leafy substance from a bag

Myra: "Ohmygod, is that- WEED?"

Audience gasps

GoldieTheFazbear: "Nah, it ain't illegal in FanficVerse.

Mangle: "Wh-what's weed?"

Myra: "Well, you'll find out in a second!"

Goldie quickly rolls it up in some cigar paper. Myra lights it, and sticks the burning paper under Mangle's nose.

Mangle: "Huh- What are you- Ohh, that's the stuff,"

Mangle instantly perks up from the cannabis.

Mangle: "So? Who're we gonna talk about now? Are we gonna trash talk? Ooh!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Welp, it actually worked! Alright, so what do you think about your classmates? Let's start with the Fazbastar- I mean, the Fazgang!" *laughs nervously*

Mangle: "Oh god, you know, you're-you're right! Some of them r-really ARE bastards!"

Myra: "Are they sexy bastards? Or just regular bastards?"

Audience laughs

Goldie gives her a disapproving look

Mangle: "Sexy? Oh hell no! You know, Freddy THINKS he's so sexy just because he can get Bonnie's ass in bed with him!"

Myra: "Ugh, he's gross. He was outside the studio and he told me that I was hot- Like I would ever date him..."

GoldieTheFazbear: "OMFG, Umm, Jeremy? Could you please go kick that douche out?"

Stage Crew Jeremy: "Sounds fun!"

Jeremy runs off to kick Freddy's ass.

Myra: "THANK YOU... FINALLY! He was really annoying me before..."

Mangle: "On the other hand, Foxy would probably get more than 10 chicks laid in an hour!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "Well, t-that's... Interesting..."

Myra: "I know right? He's DEFINITELY hotter than Freddy!"

Mangle: "Yeah, but he's still a perv ass fuckboy, even though he's hot. I can't believe I'm saying this, but- I actually kinda like him-"

Audience OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHSSS

Mangle: "Oh shit- DON'T TELL HIM I SAID THAT!"

Audience boos

Random fangirl: "B-but it's SOOOOO cute!"

Mangle: "Oh, hell no!"

Myra: "OOOHH! Foxy and Mangle sitting in a tree- K-I-S-S-I-N-G!"

Mangle: "Wow, real creative..."

GoldieTheFazbear: "...And has Goldie gotten anyone laid?" *crosses fingers for NO*

[Narrator: "It was at this moment that Goldie knew: She fucked up."]

Mangle: "Oh- Actually- yeah."

GoldieTheFazbear: "OMFGOMFGOMFG WHO THE FUCK-"

Mangle: "YOUR MOM!"

Audience laughs

Myra: "Ohhh, she tricked you!" *high fives Mangle*

GoldieTheFazbear: "OH MY FUCKING GOD YOU HAD TO DO THAT SERIOUSLY GOD DAMN IT"

Mangle: "Trolololololololololololololololol!"

Myra: "I got news- YOU JUST GOT REKT M8!"

Goldie facepalms and shakes her head.

GoldieTheFazbear: *groans* "Oh god, Bonnie and Chica?"

Mangle: "Well, I get the vibe that Bonnie's a gold digger since Freddy's like a billionaire..."

Myra: "Seems accurate. Why else would she date HIM anyways?"

GoldieTheFazbear: "TO be completely honest- No, he's not that attractive. So for the money? I mean- He's a little dickbag..."

Mangle: "And Chica- OH GOD, she CRIES SO FUCKING MUCH!"

Myra: "Sex with her must be REALLL noisy then!"

Audience laughs

GoldieTheFazbear: "Hehe. Let's move on to some bitchier peeps. What about the Toys?"

Mangle: "Well, Toy Bonnie's like- IN LOVE with her makeup. SO in love that it would be no surprise if she was fucking it."

Audience laughs.

Myra: "Geez. I would NOT want to see THAT! Shoving a mascara wand up there? OH HELL NO!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "GOD DAMN I JUST PICTURED THAT"

Audience laughs HARDDDDDD

Mangle: "And Toy Chica? She's kind of a hoe. Slightly better though.."

Myra: "Wonder who she's slept with... Hmm..."

Mangle: "Toy Freddy? Oh god, he's fat as a whale, but he OBVIOUSLY doesn't give two shits about it."

GoldieTheFazbear: "Uh, DUUH? He broke my motherfucking neck!"

Myra: "Ouch... Sex with that guy would be like-suicide!"

Audience laughs

GoldieTheFazbear: "Well, thank you Myra, for the unnecessarily sexual images that you've just put into my mind!"

Myra: "Aww, no problem! That did go better than planned!"

Mangle: "And just so you know, I don't need the weed to be like this. I just can't in front of those two hoes- but thanks for the free weed anyways! Peace out bitches!"

GoldieTheFazbear: "And you know what guys? This concludes our last interview of the Fazgang and the Toys. But hey! You know that all of you'll get the chance to pose as yourself or an OC ask extra questions to EVERYONE from Fazbear Preschool, even ME, if needed! Just so you know, THE SHOW'S NOT OVER YET!"

Myra: "Bye, everyone!"

Curtain closes.

Audience cheers.

 **Wow, I didn't think I would EVER finish the interviews, but I DID! YAAAAAYYY! Thanks to all of you who read, favorited, followed, reviewed, and most importantly- All of you who gave suggestions, OC's, and those who kept me up with nice comments! THANK ALL OF YOU SOOOO MUCH for all of your support! Moving on now! Now open: A mini series of backstage convos! This is where you can ask ANY questions as an OC or yourself to any of the characters from Fazbabies. And to make things better, you can even ask me random question! (because I'm an idiot but also because all of you are AWESOME! Thanks again, and bye for now!**

 **-Goldie**

 **Special Thanks To: (OC Submissions)**

 **BonnieBunBun- Herself (Bonnie)**

 **SlenderKnight132- Springtrapper (Foxy)**

 **Dragonspinner35- Savion (Toy Bonnie)**

 **FoxyThePirate002- Trigger (Chica)**

 **FoxyTheMagicianFox- Thomas (Toy Freddy)**

 **Mari The Cutie- Mari (Toy Chica)**

 **RaikouAwesome1234- Myra (Mangle)**


	12. A Sequel? Challenge and Prize!

**Hey guys, Goldie here- AGAIN - with an offer for none other but YOU guys! Since you are the ones who took the time to give suggestions, OCs, and made the story into what it is, I am putting up an opportunity for one of you to COLLAB with me on the soon to come sequel of the Interview! But first *drumroll please...* there must be a challenge! (You: NO FUCKING WAY GOLDIE)**

 **This challenge will determine who I will collab with for this sequel. It involves writing a FNAF short story under 5000 words. Here are some of the rules and guidelines.**

 **1\. The story should involve either yourself or an OC at some point.**

 **2\. Hate to be a total English Teacher, but your short story must have a beginning, conflict, rising action, climax, falling action, and resolution. If you need extra clarification on this, feel free to PM me :)**

 **3\. You can choose from these genres/topics: 1- Age Regression, 2-Romance (WHY NOT), 3- Horror/Survival, 4- Humor/Drama, 5- Tragedy**

 **4\. It must involve only one generation of animatronics (EX: Fazgang, Toys, Nightmares) Misfits being an exception**

 **5\. Once you are done, please don't PM me the story. Instead, save it as a DocX and send it to me!**

 **There are no more expectations to meet! The rest is all up to you! And even if you don't win, I can still take some story suggestions for you!**


	13. ONE MORE ANNOUNCEMENT AND DUE DATES!

**OK, I KNOW THIS IS PROBABLY LATE, BUT I HAVE ONE MORE ANNOUNCEMENT REGARDING THE SEQUEL TO THE INTERVIEW, AND THE SUBMISSIONS FOR THE** **BACKSTAGE CONVOS AND THE CONTEST** **.**

 **ALL BACKSTAGE CONVO SUBMISSIONS ARE DUE BY JUNE 10TH, 2016** **. ALL CHARACTERS WILL BE ACCEPTED.**

 **THE CONTEST SUBMISSIONS WILL BE DUE BY JULY 25TH, 2016** **.**

 **I'M GIVING ALL OF YOU** **PLENTY OF TIME** **TO RESPOND. I JUST WANTED TO SET A COUPLE OF DUE DATES SO THAT I DON'T SKIP ANY SUBMISSIONS FOR THIS. IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO TAKE PART IN THE CONTEST, PLEASE PM ME AND I WILL SET UP A DOCX CONNECTION FOR YOU. ALSO, MORE BACKSTAGE CONVO SUBMISSIONS WOULD BE GREAT.**

 **THANKS,**

 **GOLDIE**


End file.
